Right now, you’re probably hunkered down with your Netflix, making your way bravely through the second season of Daredevil, right? (Spoiler: He joins the Avengers in the end and then dies in a cutscene from Age of Ultron. Who saw that coming?) That’s a nice plan for the weekend, but considering you’re reading this right now, it’s likely not your only one. And really, it’s a smart move. There’s a lot of Internet out there just passing you by during your binge-watch and if you were offline for any amount of time this week, you probably already missed a lot: commentary on Hillary Clinton’s facial expressions, Hermione beatboxing, and a whole new reason for social media to talk about Heathers. Shouldn’t you be thinking about this kind of thing instead? (Or, for that matter, this kind of thing?) Make up for your failure by catching up with these, the highlights of the last seven days on our wonderful web—and by the way, we were lying about Daredevil.

You’ll Find That Life Is Still Worthwhile If You Just…

What Happened: What do you say to a presidential candidate who’s just had a great night of primary victories? Hint: It’s not suggesting that they look happier.

Where It Blew Up: Twitter, blogs, media think pieces

What Really Happened: Hillary Clinton had a very good night on Tuesday, winning all five of the states voting that day (although Missouri was a close one). However, her victory speech didn’t please many male pundits, with one—MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough, of the show Morning Joe—offering a particularly note of advice:

Needless to say, it was not a welcome suggestion. But, thankfully, Full Frontal host Samantha Bee knew how to respond:

And then she suggested that other women follow suit, and they did.

There’s a lot more out there. Just check Twitter for the hashtag #SmileForJoe. Hopefully, Scarborough has learned his lesson, but really? Probably not.

The Takeaway: Will other (male) politicians and public figures get similar scrutiny in the future? Eh…?

How to Make Your SCOTUS Nomination Go Viral

What Happened: President Obama realized that, in order to get people to pay attention to his Supreme Court nomination, he needed to pick a name that people would remember.

Where It Blew Up: Twitter, blogs, media think pieces

What Really Happened: As we’ve already pointed out, the White House wasn’t taking any chances in getting people online to talk about Wednesday’s Supreme Court nominee, launching a dedicated Twitter account for the nomination process. Turns out, that wasn’t necessary, because all that was actually needed was ensuring that the nominee had a name primed to go viral. Isn’t that right, Merrick Garland?

For all the serious articles looking into his background, or wondering about his chances of confirmation, Twitter had more important business to deal with—namely, coming to terms with his name:

Even those who weren’t explicitly making fun of the name were having trouble:

Of course, as many tweets pointed out, the name “Merrick Garland” might just be a cover:

America, you can just admit that you’d really love to see Poetic Justice Lamar on the Supreme Court. It’s OK.

The Takeaway: It really is rough, being nominated for SCOTUS. Never mind the political process (and, really, Republicans, just give the poor guy a hearing; you know you want to), no matter what happens Garland is going to have to deal with all these jokes about his name for the rest of his life.

Got a Lot Farther By Working a Lot Harder

What Happened: Continuing the oddly political week in review, let’s see what’s happening at the White House, shall we?

Where It Blew Up: Twitter, blogs, media think pieces

What Really Happened: The Internet ground to a halt Monday afternoon, thanks to a livestream from the White House showing a performance of Hamilton. This was not a surprise, especially considering how some fans were acting even hours before the performance began:

One of those fans? The First Lady:

Of course, the cast of the show helped build anticipation with a number of behind-the-scenes tweets:

And then, for a few brief moments, it happened:

But literally, it was just a few moments, as the live stream cut out after just two songs, to much upset. (Dear everyone: We’re pretty sure rights issues would prevent the entire show from being broadcast live online, even by the White House.)

And with that, the country slowly, begrudgingly, and with more than an ounce of bitterness, went back to work while longing to be in the room where it happe—oh, you were there before us.

The Takeaway: We’ll always have this:

Harry Would Be Proud (Or Jealous)

What Happened: Fresh from the White House, Hamilton’s Lin-Manuel Miranda met someone even more powerful: a real-life* wizard. (*And by “real-life,” we mean “She played one in some movies.”)

Where It Blew Up: Blogs, media think pieces

What Really Happened: Of course, President Obama wasn’t the only VIP Lin-Manuel Miranda talked to this week: He also talked to Emma Watson in a series of videos for Facebook (supporting HeForShe, the UN campaign for gender equality) that are tailor made to go viral. Don’t believe us? Just watch.

Hamilton Hogwarts houses and Emma Watson beatboxing? No wonder this appeared to be everywhere for awhile.

The Takeaway: Between this and the White House visit, have we reached Peak Hamilton? If not, then where, exactly, is it going to go next? Do we need to get NASA involved? It feels like we need to get NASA involved.

Reboot Me Gently With a Chainsaw

What Happened: TV Land announced that it would be making a reboot of the classic 1980s movie Heathers, but with a twist. Heathers fans did not like the twist.

Where It Blew Up: Twitter, blogs, media think pieces

What Really Happened: News broke Wednesday that TV Land has become the latest network to plan a TV version of the dark comedy Heathers. This new version, however, wouldn’t be a straight adaptation of the movie; instead, it would be a “comedic anthology… that takes place in the present day” featuring an all-new group of Heathers who aren’t the mean girls, but instead are “popular-but-evil” outcasts, including a lesbian and a fat kid.

Fans of the original were not happy at this reimagining, to say the least:

The Takeaway: This is where a little historical perspective helps considerably, because TV Land is the third outfit to attempt to turn the movie into a TV show—it’d previously been in the works at both Bravo and Fox, before quietly disappearing after a period of development. If experience teaches us anything, it’s that Heathers is surprisingly resistant to showing up on the small screen. So perhaps fans have little to worry about after all.

Original article: 

While You Were Offline: The Heathers Reboot Not a Single Person Asked For