What a week this was on our Internets: New Radiohead! New Justin Timberlake! New Boaty McBoatface! Yes, that last one is real. Even though the Natural Environment Research Council chose to ignore the web’s McBoatface name request and dub its new vessel RRS Sir David Attenborough, it turns out that Boaty lives on as a remote-controlled undersea vehicle. Boaty McSubface? Whatever. Let’s just all agree to be happy with what we’ve got, because there’s more than enough to get upset about elsewhere. Don’t believe me? Oh, friends: Just take a look at what you might have missed over the past seven days or so.

Ill-Advised Cinco de Mayo Greetings From the Donald

What Happened: Now that he’s all-but-certain to be the Republican nominee for president of the United States, Donald Trump used Cinco de Mayo to try and win over some new fans.
Where It Blew Up: Twitter, media think pieces
What Really Happened: In a piece of news that surprised many this week, Donald Trump became the presumptive presidential nominee of the Republic Party after winning the Indiana primary in such a fashion that his remaining rivals, Ted Cruz and John Kasich, dropped out of the race. (Cruz did, thankfully, exit with an appropriately meme-worthy maneuver.) It’s not that people didn’t think Trump would get it, as such; it’s more that they didn’t think he’d do so this soon, and with so many questions remaining about how he’d pivot to a general election. How, for example, would he win over Hispanic voters after the many, many racist things he’s said in the primary?

Oh, don’t worry; the brain behind Celebrity Apprentice had a plan, tweeting this on May 5:

The tone deaf tweet was everywhere almost immediately, with many pointing out how offensive it was.

Response on Twitter was exactly as should be expected, as well:

So viral was Trump’s bizarro outreach effort that one woman’s response to it on Facebook also went viral. To be fair, Andrea Mucino’s response was an impressive takedown: “Too bad a taco bowl isn’t Mexican, the Trump Tower Grill isn’t either, you’re not eating taco bowls from New York because you’re in WV today, Cinco de Mayo isn’t a Hispanic holiday, it’s a Mexican one, and you are the same color as the taco bowl shell,” she wrote. “But I digress!” Still, at least one Fox News contributor was convinced, and that’s half the battle.
The Takeaway: If nothing else, we should perhaps congratulate Mr. Trump on being consistent:

But Really, How Does the Republican National Committee’s Twitter Account Feel About Trump?

What Happened: Actually, how is the GOP dealing with Trump being the nominee? One tweet suggests the answer is “with a strong case of denial.”
Where It Blew Up: Twitter
What Really Happened: Of course, the Republican race for the nomination has been universally acknowledged as a mess by almost everyone, with the party split between those pledging loyalty to Trump and those pledging #NeverTrump or #StopTrump. Even House Speaker Paul Ryan is publicly saying that he can’t support Trump yet, joining the two living former Republican presidents (and the guy who ran for the party last time) in withholding support. So how did the official Republican National Committee Twitter account greet Trump’s ascendancy?

Yes. That seems convincing. Look, these people are convinced:

Perhaps the most notable response came from Ben Sasse:

Why is that reasonably restrained tweet notable? Well, in itself, it’s not—but Sasse is the Republican senator from Nebraska, and was so moved by the way in which his party has responded to Trump’s candidacy that he wrote an open letter on Facebook of all places to explain that he could not support Trump.

“Please understand: I’m not an establishment Republican, and I will never support Hillary Clinton,” he wrote. “I’m a movement conservative who was elected over the objections of the GOP establishment. My current answer for who I would support in a hypothetical matchup between Mr. Trump and Mrs. Clinton is: Neither of them. I sincerely hope we select one of the other GOP candidates, but if Donald Trump ends up as the GOP nominee, conservatives will need to find a third option.”

The Takeaway: Yes, the party is definitely better for current events. Definitely.

Lean #Out

What Happened: Spinning out of recent events and the fact that May is Asian Pacific American Heritage Month, a new hashtag brings focus to Hollywood’s lack of Asian-American representation.
Where It Blew Up: Twitter, media think pieces
What Really Happened: One subject that has been much discussed lately is the lack of Asian representation in movies, especially in light of the Scarlett Johansson-featuring first image from the all-white Ghost in the Shell remake and the sight of Tilda Swinton playing the traditionally Tibetan “Ancient One” in Marvel’s Doctor Strange. The combination of those two—hardly unusual, sadly—decisions has led to a lot of people talking about how poorly Asian actors have it in Hollywood.

With May being Asian Pacific American Heritage Month, the Nerds of Color site teamed up with Margaret Cho and We Need Diverse Books to launch something called #WhiteWashedOUT, a month of online discussion about this very topic. Discussion on Twitter quickly showed the need for this kind of thing:

The campaign has been noticed by a number of outlets, but the real question is, will Hollywood itself notice… and if so, do something to fix the problem?
The Takeaway: If nothing else, we can rest assured that at least one person in Hollywood has been paying attention: Doctor Strange director Scott Derrickson, who tweeted this midway through the week:

Pounded in the Hugos, So to Speak

What Happened: Despite an attempt to co-opt dinosaur erotica writer Chuck Tingle for a rightwing agenda, things have gone rather strange and wonderful when it comes to this year’s Hugo Awards.
Where It Blew Up: Twitter, blogs
What Really Happened: Late last week, the nominees for the 2016 Hugo Awards were announced, and on the list this year was the Internet’s favorite dinosaur erotica specialist and Bernie Sanders fan, Chuck Tingle—an inclusion that had some wondering if he was a plant of the anti-progressive agenda’s continual attempt to disrupt the awards.

That theory was seemingly confirmed by a blog post by a big dog in the Rabid/Sad Puppies continuum, Vox Day, wherein he wrote “Chuck Tingle’s nomination is not a joke. Well, all right, it is. But it’s arguably less of a joke than N.K. Jemisin’s affirmative-action reward for hating the ‘beardy old middle-class middle-American guys’ who created the field.” But how would Tingle react to the truth behind his nomination? With absurdity, initially. (Well, after Slammed In the Butt By My Hugo Award Nomination, but you expected that, right?)

He also turned his attention to Vox Day himself, recasting him as “Voxman,” also known as the father of Keanu Reeves and writer of the first two Matrix movies. Oh, and those who follow Vox’s lead are, in Chuck’s world, “devilmen.” Don’t ask, just go with it:

But his finest move? Protecting his true identity by declining to attend the Hugo Awards ceremony, and choosing the ideal person to attend in his absence.

Yes, Zoe Quinn. The game developer and original target of Gamergate has been tapped to go in Tingle’s stead. Just in terms of trolling the trolls so very, very hard, let’s just give Tingle/Quinn the Hugo now, please?
The Takeaway: What’s next in the cold war between Tingle and Vox et. al? Chuck has an idea:

The Weirdest Premiere in Cannes History

What Happened: How to get buzz for your movie: Promise not to screen it for 100 years, and then announce that you’re showing it at Cannes. Kind of.
Where It Blew Up: Twitter, Media think pieces
What Really Happened: This is just surreal. This year’s Cannes Film Festival will debut 100 Years—the Movie You Will Never See, a new movie by Robert Rodriguez, starring John Malkovich… kind of. It will, you see, literally debut the movie… except that it won’t screen the movie. That won’t happen until the year 2115, apparently; what will be seen at Cannes is a safe that allegedly contains the movie, because that’s a thing.

The ridiculous, weird publicity stunt certainly generated headlines, although somewhat confused ones.

When Twitter addressed the subject, it was suitably skeptical:

The Takeaway: If nothing else, we can congratulate the movie industry for finding a new way for actors to avoid admitting that they haven’t had any jobs recently: “So, what have you been up to?” “Oh, filming a new project.” “That’s great! When will it be released?” “One hundred years from now, after you’re dead. It’s one of those movies.”

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While You Were Offline: Trump Loves ‘Hispanics,’ Taco Bowls